A Stitch in Haste

I am rapidly becoming convinced that the Palin pick will go down as the worst political blunder since Mondale’s “I just did” speech.
–Me, August 28, 2008

While everyone tries to make head or tails of precisely what Sarah Palin is planning for the future, it would behoove us all to recall Sarah Palin’s past and how she came to this tragicomic point where anyone even cares:

–Palin had to attend five colleges (one twice) before she could finally get around to graduating. A nominal “communications” major, Palin never joined a college newspaper or television station. She never released her transcripts or academic (disciplinary?) records.

–Palin’s sole foray into the private sector (other than brief stints as a local sportscaster and then sports reporter) was as a beauty pageant contestant. Palin was Carrie Prejean before Carrie Prejean was Carrie Prejean.

–Palin started her political career as mayor of what was essentially a giant strip mall. Palin’s Wasilla (2005 population: 6,500; annual budget: $18 million) had no fire department, no EMT service and no sanitation department; that was all provided by Anchorage. It did have a police department — Palin fired the police chief under dubious circumstances — and a public library, complete with books Palin inquired about the possibility of banning.

–By her own standards of “traditional family values,” Palin is a failure as a parent.

–As for “governor of Alaska” (98% owned by the federal government), recall this other old post of mine, also from August 2008:

Alaska has no declining industry, no blighted inner cities (or the racial tensions that often accompany them), no aging infrastructure. No baby boomer entitlement crisis, no illegal immigrant crisis, no subprime mortgage crisis. And, contrary to the delusions of some, neither Alaska nor its governor are fending off Vladimir Putin at the Bering Straits or negotiating treaties with Ottawa. What exactly would you expect a governor of Alaska to do all day besides hunt, fish and flip-flop on the Bridge to Nowhere?

The only thing that occasionally makes Alaska difficult to govern is — Alaska Republicans. Go figure.

This — running what really is a puny state with puny problems — was what Palin concluded was too difficult to do anymore. Call it the Palin Doctrine™: If you can’t stand the heat, get back in the kitchen.

Folks, stop imagining a mystery where none exists: She’s an idiot. A real-life Chauncey Gardner. That’s all there is to her resignation. There is no “crazy like a fox” aspect to her announcement — it’s strictly “stupid is as stupid does.”

Her circuits finally overloaded, and she could no longer find a way to smile and wink her way out of actually having to deal with an issue or two. The fact that she came to within a inside royal flush of becoming president is nothing more than a combination of circumstance, political scheming (by others), and plain old dumb luck — with emphasis on the “dumb.”

All the more reason to expect — to demand — more from politicians, and from voters.

Previously:
–On Palin
–From the Archives: The Alaskan Tax Vulture
–David Broder’s Gubernatorial Survivor Bias

Filed under: Politics